The Title Says it All
So my dad was offered several free magazine subscriptions that he had basically already paid for so he decided to get some random titles that looked like they might be interesting. One of the magazines he is having sent to the house is called Working Mother.
Sounds interesting right? Well, when the first one arrived I flipped through it and found it to be both intriguing and appalling at the same time. This second issue is no different.
On the cover there is a perfectly coiffed platinum blonde mother and her two platinum blond children. One boy and one girl of course and they look to be about 7 and 10. Oh, and by the way, the Papa is missing in the photo because this is about the working mother.
In the past year or so, I have come to the conclusion that you cannot be a mom and a career woman and be satisfied with your life in both arenas. You can either be the best mom or be the best at your career. It takes more than 40 hours a week to do either them exceptionally and there aren’t enough hours in the week (unless you intend not to sleep and no one can go full throttle on no sleep for long).
Now I’m not saying that a mom can’t work. In fact, there are a lot of women who enjoy their jobs and being a mom. And there are lots of women who have jobs they might not like so much but have them because of financial constraints on the family. What I am saying is that the focus and time allotment to really succeed cannot be divided between two objectives: motherhood and careerhood.
The table of contents of Working Mother really hits this dilemma on the head, or should I say the order in which articles are clumped exemplify the point. First up are the articles focused on You, then Work, and finally Family.
The main problem is found in the first focus: you. When we focus on ourselves everything else does come secondarily and even tertiarily. But I believe that our positions in which we serve others (family and church) suffer the most. Even careers don’ suffer as much because ultimately a career is also self-focused and about how I can get ahead, make more money, attain esteem, etc.
Obscure for those outside the nerd world:
I say hyphenation is cheating
Kyle, this is incredible! I am blown away. Very profound and thought provoking. I wish you the best and I know you will serve our country well. God bless you and your family.
All I can say is what the Lord once said to me — I know that’s very subjective.
But I once spent a great deal of time repenting of my feelings. I considered my feelings the TRUE expression of me. Once in the midst of such a repentence, The Lord broke in and said. That’s not who you are — it’s just how you feel
Similiar thing happened when we first moved to Tulsa. I was simply contemplating my last few months working with children in Lawton; ruminating on the adage that you can’t fool a child. Thinking, yes, you can. I fooled them every week. I didn’t love them but they thought I did. Again, I was interrupted when the Lord said, that was love. Love isn’t a warm fuzzy feeling — it’s what you do and you LOVED those children for me.
One of the most powerful teachings I have hung onto through the years came from a converted Jewish woman whose name I have forgotten. She was the speaker at a retreat I went to when we first moved to Lawton. The series of messages was Obedience: Squeals, Squawks and the deluxe combo. Squealing obedience was when what we’re given to do is exactly what we want to do and we squeal with joy. Squawking obedience is the opposite. And the dexlue combo are those situations that begin either squeaking or squawking and then the experiences reverses itself. The point she made over and over again was that if we obeyed regardless of our feelings [squawking] The Lord would write in His book _________obeyed me, one more time.
I think feelings matter but I don’t find evidence God is judging us by them. He is moved by the feelings of our infirmities.
Side bar — but we all have ways we used to “fix” ourselves when our feelings begin to overwhelm us – my pesonal favorite is worship. Which anyone can do driving down the road. Lenghty devotions are not the only solution. Kerry uses worship and also has a wonderful testimony of using just giving thanks.
How in the world are you having time to listen to so many messages and post reviews in the afternoon? Are you leading a double life? I am jealous, I never have that kind of time with my work…
I think the poem is spot-on, having lived on an anvil of late. Thanks for transcribing it! Hope I get a semi-noble part.
I don’t have time to read any more. But I have plenty of time to listen. In due deference though, I didn’t transcribe it. The lovely folks at Dave Harvey’s church sent me a copy when they wrote back to me.
I did put in the proper line breaks, tho’.
It seems there were only the two entrants. So who won?
Hope everything’s ok. Our prayers are with you guys.
When is his appointment with a neuro?
Dang! What would a person do with nearly 9 gallons of mince meat?!
I do happen to like mince meat pie, though my tastes are probably off since I’m used to the store bought stuff. Still, 9 gallons…
Blegh. I remember what happened the last time mincemeat was consumed in our family.
MMM, that does sound good. Next time you cook up a batch send me a couple of cans
.